every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Randomize
