8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
