Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
