can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
