just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Randomize
