first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Swine flu. Run for my life!
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize