After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
