sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I could have mohawked her pubes.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
