Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
