she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Banned from zoo.
Again?
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
