There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize
