toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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