In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize