I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
