RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
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