why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
The cops high fived after they tackled you
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Randomize