It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
