I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
A bitchslap is in order.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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