Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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