bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Randomize
