I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
