if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
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