We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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