Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
There's always time for handjobs
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Randomize
