quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Randomize
