He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
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