She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize