what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
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