Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize
