god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
