I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Randomize