I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
