I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize