You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
All I want is dick and wine.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
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