what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
