Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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