His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Randomize
