He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
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