yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Randomize
