No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Randomize
