I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
my poor anus
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
