So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize
