Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
How naked do you want me to be?
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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