i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
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