take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Randomize
