Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I wish i was in the wii world.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Randomize
