Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
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