belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
