Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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