I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize