At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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