Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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